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Being a long-distance caregiver is a challenge when you live in one state and your aging parents live in another. Or if you have a busy job that keeps you from hands-on caregiving. Or if a sibling is providing more local care and you can’t be there. And caregiving responsibilities are on the rise. According to AARP, nearly 1 in 5 Americans provide care to an adult.  If you are a long-distance caregiver there is plenty for you to do to help your family.

10 ways to help as a long-distance caregiver

Organize Care

Research caregivers that help your parents with medical care or with Activities of Daily Living (ADL). ADL includes tasks such as eating, bathing, dressing, toileting, and walking. You can make the calls and check references remotely.

For information on various levels of caregivers and how to hire them, check out this helpful article from AARP.

Hire Helpers

But what if your parents don’t need an in-depth caregiver at this point? They can still benefit from a helper, or Personal Care Assistant (PCA) who assists with errands, driving, and light household tasks. A helper can be found through friends and family. If you live near a college or university, you can hire  a responsible student to help with chores in-between classes. 

Additionally, you can arrange for more help around the house such as house cleaners, lawn maintenance, meal prep, and delivery services.

Organize Help and Meals from Friends and Family

Particularly after a hospitalization, your parents may need a lot of short-term help. Many people want to do something and you can organize meals to be delivered. Some websites send out requests for help and organize your volunteers. Check out Lotsa Helping Hands and Meal Train – – the websites do most of the work for you.

Shop Online and Deliver to Them

A huge help to your parents is to keep them stocked so they don’t run out of basic necessities. Especially if your parents live in cold weather climates or they are not getting out as much, getting household items delivered to their door can be a great help.

• Order basic household staples such as toiletries, paper towels, toilet paper, etc., from Amazon or Costco.

• Re-order medications and vitamins through their pharmacies.

• Order meals from restaurants with delivery services or use GrubHub, DoorDash, or UberEats. If your parents have low income, they may qualify for a Meals on Wheels meal delivery program.

Check out Caregiver Support Groups

Sounds strange, doesn’t it? If you aren’t the primary caregiver, why is this helpful? One of the best advantages of not doing day-to-day care is to see the “big” picture. Also, the primary caregiver may be too busy with the caregiving to attend a support group. Talk with other caregivers and hear what challenges they face to make you better prepared to care for your loved one. Learn their tips and tricks for helping their family members.

Research local caregiver support groups in your community. Listen to caregiving podcasts and check out caregiver websites for help and support.

Update Friends and Family

The local caregiver has enough to do and can’t always be keeping everyone up to date. Talk with the caregiver and send updates to friends and family. Make sure that you are only revealing information that your family member wants you to disclose. By sending out emails or texts, you take some burden off of the caregiver. And you can also ask for help from friends and family if necessary.

Research Medical Issues and Set Up Appointments

When your parent is facing a particular medical issue, it is often confusing. They may not remember what the doctor said. Or you may need to find a specialist.  Make the appointments and fill out paperwork to be extra helpful. Consider a health care power of attorney where your parent names you as their agent to help with medical decisions.

Find more information about their medical conditions. You may find ways to help with their ailments. Websites such as WebMD or the Mayo Clinic give you information on medical terms and issues.

Handle the Finances

An extremely helpful task is managing bills, medical claims (ugh!), and finances. If your parent is incapacitated or having cognitive difficulty, you will want to help them with this. A great idea is for your parents to name you as a durable power of attorney.

Furthermore, finances can be handled remotely, Most financial institutions offer online banking, bill pay services, and mobile deposits. There are web-based money management services such as Quicken or Mint to track spending.

Make a 911 Family Binder

Organize important medical, financial, and legal information for your parents. This is particularly helpful in an emergency such as a sudden hospitalization. By putting together a 911 Family Binder, you have one place for health care power of attorney, banking information, etc. Set up a command central so you can provide documents and manage information.

Be a Cheerleader

The primary caregiver has a lot to handle. Provide comfort and support. Look for ways to help them out. For example, when my sister was caring for my mom after a hospital procedure, I had dinners delivered for her family. And I paid for laundry services. Since she had the burden of caring for my mom, I wanted to help her family. Lend a supportive ear and offer encouragement. Caregiving can often be a lonely and thankless job.

Another idea is to send care and comfort packages to your parents. Cozy blankets, herbal teas, magazines, and books are all nice ways to lift their spirits. Show you care by sending something for the caregivers also.

Finally, realize that there is only so much you can do. Long-distance and logistics make it harder to help, even though you want to. Oftentimes, a long-distance caregiver suffers from the guilt that they are not doing “more”. Incorporate these tips to lean in and offer more assistance.

Do you have any advice to help a long-distance caregiver? Leave your tips in the comment section below.